I’d Smash

So as I was peacefully drifting off to sleep last night around 3am ( because I couldn’t sleep), my phone vibrated informing me of a new message from POF. I was curious, so I opened it up and inside was this wonderful message:

id Smash

Now, normally, I wouldn’t reply to this sort of message, but I thought it would make for a pretty entertaining post, so here’s the rest of the conversation:

I’d hit

why don’t you bring that talk to my house and (City) and hit then pretty lady

Sure, I’ll be right over.

haha yeah, if only you were telling the truth

And if only you weren’t

i swear if you came here I would lay it to you as much as you wanted im just not able to go to (My City)

Oh what a shame. I was hoping someone would “lay it to me” tonight.

yeah it is a shame because with that attitude, you need a good laying

I’m so glad you’ve looked into my laying schedule. I’ll be sure to pencil you in for next weekend.

haha im just joking don’t get your panties up in a wad pretty lady

Oh my panties are perfectly fine. Thanks for checking though.

your welcome, so how does a girl as gorgeous as yourself end up being single

Because of guys like you.

ohhhhhh burn, someones laying on the wrong side of the bed

I didn’t bother replying after that. It was 3:22am and I was tired. I don’t know what the point of all that was, but I guess I can’t expect much more than that at 3 in the morning. My hope in online dating is slowly deteriorating. And so is my hope for mankind. I mean seriously. No punctuation. No common sense. Is this what our generation has come to? Telling random girls on a dating website that you’d “smash?” So sad.

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